we're chasing vodka with high fives
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
