Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Floor bacon is actually really good
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Randomize
