i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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