wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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