You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize