Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
