Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
my being single is dangerous.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
