I wish I could teleport
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
