i don't want you to think of me as your TA
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
