you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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