So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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