Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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