so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
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