how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
