I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
