Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
