i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Of course I have a pirate flag
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Randomize
