Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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