I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
