your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
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