I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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