i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Randomize
