I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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