You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
