ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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