I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Randomize