I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
