Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
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