I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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