Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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