I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
