Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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