We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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