So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize