i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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