Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
