Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I just want to make out with him forever
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
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