this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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