i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
there is puke in my bra ... again
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