If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
