Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
