I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Randomize
