I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
