My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
