did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
I can text with my tongue
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
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