He is an equal opportunity slut.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..