oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
