Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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