I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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