you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
