I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Randomize
